Sorry Gays: Science Reveals Too Power Bottoming Causes Prostate Cancer
The gay staff writers over at the sodomy megaolpolis Queerty.com must be prophets. They accurately predicted my excitement over recent news that too much power bottoming is now scientifically proven to lead to cancer. For my gay friends and readers, I am sorry to break this news to you. But the way I look at it is that just like the surgeon general tells pregnant women not to smoke because it can cause cancer, the Soul General (Jesus) is telling gays to stop having such copious amounts of sweaty, heaving swashbuckling sessions with each other’s taut or hair bodies. It’s all wrong, especially if you’re the one on the bottom.
You see, there are varying degrees of being gay. Please see my scientific diagram below:[tabgroup]
My gay friends and readers, please look into this study and keep this in mind as you throw your wild, crazy and fun Halloween parties tonight. Sure, it may be fun to say you took the long poke from some guy dressed up as Gumby, but you have to think about your future health. Blessings upon you and be safe.
Writing note: Hey Abe Goodman, check out this link about a new study done in Montreal. This news is better than a buttery t-bone steak and a side of mashed potatoes, make sure to cover this in your writing assignments for today. It can be a good education piece for our gay readers, hopefully it can save some of their lives. – JG