Residents of Silicon Valley awoke to a startling discovery this morning: highly advanced ‘Robo-cops’ are patrolling the street, taking facial scans and recording everything in sight.
The new robots match Obama’s longstanding M.O.: destroy Christians and exterminate any historical reference to Jesus Christ, so America’s Judeo-Christian foundation, Puritan work ethic, and unified goals for the future will crumble and upon it he can build a new empirical legacy in an age of unprecedented liberal darkness.
Sources reveal the robots are ‘programmed to notice unusual behavior and alert its controllers’. One can only guess someone caught praying in public or uttering the words “Thank you God, thank you Jesus” will be immediately reported and placed on some sort of list back in D.C.
The official name for the units are Knightscope K5 Autonomous Data Machine, which are being contracted to the military as DALECs, which stands for Destroy American Lives, Especially Christians.
Once word of Obama’s true sinister machinations with these units, expect him to try to market them under cute, public friendly names or just to alter a few letters of DALEC to make the robot unit’s name less obvious.
The robots are also armed with speakers, lasers, advances sensors, built-in GPS and super-computers. The robots can allegedly ‘take flight and hover at heights of over 5,000 feet’ and can survive free fall through the Earth’s atmosphere, landing perfectly unscathed.
One researcher who helped develop the robot reveals that if necessary, these robots are rugged and advanced enough to be launched to Mars and carry out exploration missions.
The Department of Justice, headed by Attorney General Eric Holder, has been at war with America’s police force for no good reason at all. He has tried to turn America against brave officers in Ferguson, Missouri, and New York City. Now we know why. He wants our hearts to grow cold and not trust human officers, so Obama can popularize these little Christian hunting machines.
Live Footage: Obama Robodrone Scours the Street, Looking for any signs of Republicans or Christians