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Gays Now Force God to Unleash Rare Thundersnow Blizzard Upon America

Thundersnow: Just like God pommeled Pharaoh with wraths of frogs, plague and the crashing Red Sea, America is suffering wrath for not 'letting gay marriage go'.
thundersnow in boston
Thundersnow: Just like God pommeled Pharaoh with wraths of frogs, plague and the crashing Red Sea, America is suffering wrath for not ‘letting gay marriage go’.

 

Yesterday, God’s wrath was unleashed upon America as he allowed the coldest blizzard in the history of modern times crash upon the Eastern seaboard.

A Weather Channel meteorologist was firsthand witness to the fearfully potent thundersnow phenomenon that highlighted the blizzard that’s currently wrecking havoc in the Boston region and beyond.

gay marriage
Thundersnow is very rare, with only .07% of snowstorms producing thunder. But since 2009, when Obama became President, a dramatic 58% increase in thundersnow reports have taken place. Thundersnow needs a mass of cold air on top of warm as well as moist air closer to the ground. National Geographic reports thundersnow tends to be associated with very heavy snowfall, the type of which we have witnessed just hours after Valentine’s Day in gay marriage heavy regions.

Our Christian Broadcasting Center broke news of the devastating blizzard’s direct relationship with the per capita gay marriage rate in the affected region. It is no coincidence that the first day after ‘gay friendly’ areas of America celebrated Valentine’s Day and all sorts of newly married male couples shared very romantic dinners and uploaded the pictures for their friends to fawn over on Facebook, that we see all of this weather immediately took place.

Scientists estimate that reports of thundersnow have sharply increased by 48% since 2009, which is also the year Barack Obama took office. Since Obama took office, America’s gay marriage approval rating has also increased by 48%. This is no coincidence, this is scientific correlation implying causation. Gay marriage is causing thundersnow.

[adinserter name=”bigsky”] The Weather Channel recorded live footage of this divine phenomenon.

What do you think?

Written by Abe Goodman

Champion of American values and spreading morality to the unsaved world. And if you don't like that, you can just get out of my country smart-alack.

Comments

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  1. One “Big American News” stories was about Ebola patients rising from the dead. It’s pretty safe to assume this is parody.

  2. you are dumb and very stupid to write crap like this i’m a minister and don’t like the way you blame God or any other persons or groups of people for what the weather does!!

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