Measles Outbreak Is Being Caused by Increases In Gay Marriage

It is no coincidence that for every 1 gay marriage, four more children are becoming infected with measles.  This correlation implies causation, so if you live in a gay marriage legal portion of the country beware for your children are now 75% more likely to catch measles.

According to the CDC, measles is a highly contagious respiratory disease and it is caused by a virus.  Measles typically starts with a high fever and runny nose, then quickly produces other symptoms such as a couch, red eyes and sore throat.  Most parents may think their child has a cold until a tell-tell rash breaks out all over the body.

What makes measles in gay adults so dangerous is that adults usually do not show any symptoms.  So when a married gay man may accidentally sneeze all over your child’s cupcake or cinnamon roll as he prepares it at your local bakery, he is raising your child’s likelihood of contracting this deadly illness.

Three out of ten people who catch measles will develop more dangerous complications such as ear infections, pneumonia, diarrhea (gay bowel disease) and may have drastic changes in personality, including sassy attitude.

Prognosis

Scientists are finding a strong link between gay marriage outbreaks and per capita gay marriages in a region.  Studies show that the longer two are in continued monogamous gay contact with each other, the more targetted antibodies their bodies produce.  In someone who is a ‘carrier’ for measles, this sharply increases the odds that they become a vector who spreads the virus.

Gays held their annual “6 months till Disney Gay Day” celebration this past January and we see a measles outbreak took place 14 hours after their celebrations concluded.  The incubation period for measles?  14 hours.