City of Ferguson Outlaws Black Friday

The City of Ferguson is not allowing Black Friday to take place.

City officials in Ferguson learned early Thanksgiving Day that numerous black families in the area were secretly planning a ‘Black Friday’.

“It has come to the attention of the Ferguson Police Department that endless scores of black people planned to assemble in local stores and take merchandise at prices far lower than expected,” reported a spokesperson.

“To thwart their plans, we are ordering all stores call the police department if groups of black larger than three come into their store. These are likely flocks of Black Friday protesters with emotions that likely stem with their anger over justice being found in the recent court cases.”

K’wame Jenkins, of the area, says this is just another example of the racism in Ferguson. “These people are crazy! They just assume because it is called Black Friday, we planned it out. Damn, I gotta move out from this racist place.”

Unofficial reports confirm that police are arresting black people who are still trying to get into local stores, refusing to believe they are just shopping ‘for incredible deals’.