I am the mother of three beautiful children but one of them has worried me for years. My husband is a prominent lawyer in Massachusetts and we have a very wonderful suburban life. The youngest of my boys, however, does not partake in anything normal.
While his older brothers have gone off to college, my little ‘Sammy’ just told me a few weeks ago, he does not plan to matriculate. He instead plans to move to New York with some of his friends and launch his ‘rap career’. For years he has idolized various rappers, has worn their baggy clothing, talks in in slang and even has a black ‘sistah’ as his girlfriend.
I thought it was a phase, but I was wrong. Maybe he could start a new Beastie Boys? I spoke to a rabbi who suggested I speak to a psychiatrist, so I did. The psychiatrist told me about a new condition called ‘transracialism’. My boy said he always felt like he had African roots, but I assured him both his father and I did not. Could it be possible that somehow, genetically, my son has an inner black identify?
Concerned Mother in Massachusetts
Dear Concerned Mother,
It sounds like your son is a product of the modern-age self determination. Long gone are the days when just because one his born a male, that their gender role or even their gender will be male for life. It is very hard for many parents to cope with but it is the truth and reality. So it is definitely plausible that your son is identifying as African-American and will continue to do so throughout his life. As long as he’s not trying to do stereotypical things (slangin’ dope, loud music, disrespecting women) then you should stop being bigoted and embrace what brings him joy in life.