Eyewitness Comes Forward in Sarah Palin Family Brawl, Reveals Juicy Details

New details have emerged in the almost unbelievable ‘Made for Reality TV’ headline, “Eyewitness Comes Forward in Sarah Palin Family Brawl’.

For those not in the know, the Palin family allegedly accepted an invitation to a birthday party in South Anchorage.  The family — from Todd Palin to little Track Palin — pulled up to a home in the family’s stretch Hummer limo.

It did not take very long for the festivities and likely alcohol to run their course and give us a good deal of entertainment.

English: Todd Palin and Sarah Palin at the 201...

To

Here’s a taste of the juice:

…it started when Track confronted Willow’s former boyfriend, Conner Cleary, who was there with his father Steve and his mother Melissa. Thompson didn’t see this part, but other witnesses, who didn’t want to be named, say that Conner and Track fought on the front yard. Steve tried to break it up. Todd jumped into the mix and began to choke Steve.

After that ended, Conner, Steve, and Melissa Cleary huddled together close to Thompson, who spotted Bristol and Willow from a distance, walking straight towards them with purpose.

“They were on a b-line, coming straight at Melissa,” Thompson said.

Todd and Sarah were not about to let their kids have a good ol’ fashioned house fight without joining in.  While Todd was getting aggressive, it was Sarah who stole the show.

Reports indicate Sarah became wide-eyed, yelling profanities and quite literally ‘crawling over people’ to get to the brouhaha.

Bristol, according to Thompson and other witnesses, planted her feet, “stood straight up, brought her arm back and cold-cocked him right in the face,” Thompson said.

And then she did it again, about six more times, before he pushed her away, and she fell, and Todd appeared.

“I was thoroughly amazed at the restraint Korey showed. He’s a total gentlemen,” Thompson said.

Another melee. This time Sarah got involved and began to scream profanities at everyone. One source, who didn’t want to be named, said that she was “nearly crawling on top of people,” trying to get into the scrum.

The reports have the Alaskan elites so worked up that the source of the information has apparently been canned from his job.   The Palin family eventually left the scene, but not until Track emerged from the house, allegedly flailing extended middle fingers all around, and then getting into the family Hummer.

Now when I see all these details, I can only hope this is the type of live-footage Sarah Palin will tape and air on her new television channel.  I mean, you just cannot beat the former First Family of Alaska rolling up to a birthday party, getting down and dirty and then driving off in their stretch Hummer limo.

Saturday Night Live and all late night comedians should have to pay a ‘you wrote the monologue/sketch’ for us fee on this one.

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